The foster care system is guided by rules which vary with state. This means some things are acceptable and others unacceptable in a state as far as foster care is concerned. As a foster parent, it’s important to be aware of the don’ts as much as you are aware of the dos. It’s because of this that people ask the question: What are foster parents not allowed to do?

So, what are foster parents not allowed to do? There are many things that foster parents are not allowed to do. They are not allowed to physically discipline their foster children, they are not allowed to withhold food or water as punishment, they are not allowed to force their foster children to participate in religious activities, and they are not allowed to neglect their foster children. Additionally, foster parents are not allowed to abuse their foster children in any way, either physically, emotionally, or sexually. These are just the key things that you are not allowed to do to a foster child.

What Are Foster Parents Not Allowed To Do

In order to be a foster parent, you must be able to agree to a set of rules and guidelines that are set by the state. Not following these guidelines will get you into a problem and result in the termination of your foster care contract with your agency. This is one of the things that can happen when foster care rules are broken.

Foster parents are not allowed to post pictures of their foster child online on social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, or even on WhatsApp. If posted without your permission, you will have to contact the police or Child Protective Services (CPS) ASAP. The reason most states are against this is that foster children can be identified and put in danger.

As a foster parent, you are not allowed to talk negative things or things that might be heartbreaking or confusing to a foster child. This includes making unfeasible promises to them or talking negative about their birth parents.

Changing the appearance of a foster child such as cutting their hair is not allowed unless you have permission from the caseworker (agency) and biological parents. This also goes for changing their names.

One of the things that foster parents are not allowed to do is to live with the children they are fostering. This means that foster parents are not able to provide a permanent home for the children they are caring for.

Read About: Pros & Cons of Foster Parenting 

Another thing that foster parents are not allowed is to physically discipline their foster children.

Also, foster parents are not allowed to make their foster children do chores. At times, this can be perceived as a punishment hence breaking the set rules.

As a foster parent, you are not allowed to make your foster child do anything he/she does not want to do. It is unacceptable to force a foster child to do anything against their will.

A foster parent is not allowed to make a foster child feel like he/she is in trouble all the time. This applies to when they do a mistake as well.

Foster children are not supposed to be kept in a confined area (solitary confinement). This is totally unacceptable and can get you into more problems than losing your foster care contract.

Foster parents are not allowed to make their foster children feel like they are not wanted. They should be willing to take care of and support them during the entire fostering period.

Another thing that foster parents are not allowed to do is to abuse, neglect, or mistreat their foster children.

If you have to make a foster child do the chores, have something to give back. This is because it’s not allowed to make a foster child do your chores without pay. This is even if you are the one taking care of the bills.

Know What Makes A Good Foster Parent

Foster children are supposed to have their own space. It is because of this that you are not allowed to make them live with you in the same room. Co-sleeping is not prohibited.

Foster children are allowed to see (communicate) their biological family or friends. When they are taken into the system and you are given the chance to stay with them, it does not means that they can no longer see their friends or make new ones.

Hence, keeping foster children from seeing their family or friends or limiting the amount of time they spend together is not allowed.

Religious beliefs ought to be respected. As a foster parent, you are not allowed to force your foster child to do anything that violates his/her religious beliefs. In addition, you are not allowed to force a child to participate in any type of religious activity or ceremony.

Food and water are human basic needs. As much as you might be tempted to withhold them from a foster child, do not. This is not allowed and can get you into a problem with the state and agency as well.

Holding medication from a foster child is highly prohibited unless there is proof that the medication can be harmful to them.

You are not allowed to leave a foster child with an unapproved babysitter, even if it is an adult. If permission is granted, it should be not more than 24 hours. If it has to be longer than this, express permission should be sought from the caseworker.

Other Disallowed Things

It’s the responsibility of a foster parent to ensure the safety of a foster child. Therefore, you are not allowed to withhold safety from a foster child.

Education is important. To promote education in foster children, foster parents are not allowed to keep them from attending school.

Foster parents are not allowed to discipline their foster children in a way that is harsher than what their state or county allows. In many states, the positive reinforcement type of discipline is the one that is supported in the foster care system.

Families differ and a foster care family might have a certain way of doing things. As a foster parent, you are not allowed to force a foster child to eat, sleep or do things in a certain way because you do it yourself.

Foster children are only under your care. Due to this, you are not allowed to give a foster child away. Selling them (human trafficking) is also not allowed and if caught, you can be jailed.

Using a foster child in any type of pornography or sexually explicit conduct is prohibited. If found guilty of such undertaking, a severe action such as serving a jail term is taken.

Removing a foster child from the United States without the consent of the Department of State is not allowed.

Final Thoughts

As a foster parent, you should be vigilant and follow the set rules and guidelines. Get to know the rules that your foster care agency has laid down and understand them before signing the contract. Remember you will be liable if you breach the contract.
Understanding the Dos and Donts places you in a good position. It eliminates the possibility of doing something you are not allowed to do.